Sunday, May 18, 2008

One more thing to pray for

A negative lymph node biopsy. I've dodged every other bullet, and I know it—but I may not get the results of the biopsy (done on Thursday), until I see the oncologist again, in ten days. It's Kaiser—they may or may not call me.

I know that being anxious doesn't help me; this whole thing is one long adrenaline rush, interrupted by general anesthesia. Clear CT and PET point to safety—but I won't really know, until I get the results of the biopsy (and find out what they want to do, if it's positive).

I do see my head/neck surgeon again on Thursday, and I'll ask him. I think I'll e-mail him on Monday, and ask when I can find out.

I know that I’m grabbing at a straw here. My own prayers aren’t usually like this. I don’t know that I’ve prayed for a specific medical outcome; I know that God will do whatever God does, and God very rarely breaks the laws of physics. Throughout this, my own prayers have been all of yours—I haven’t been able to pray for myself, in the usual sense.

I really just want. to. be. done. with. this. I don’t want more neck surgery, or radiation, or chemotherapy if I can avoid it.

Thank you, all.

5 comments:

MikeF said...

What's needed here is some negative thinking ;-)

Love & prayers, always

Mike

Debbie of Boise said...

Friend, sometimes you have to bug Kaiser. You have a right to know when you are going to know. It is your right as a patient. Tests take time and you have the right to know when they will be complete and when you will be informed of the result.

I also understand there are times when you or any person fighting a life threating illness is too overwhelmed, too tired to push back against the system. You pick your battles.

You are in may prayer, dear one in this difficult time.

Anonymous said...

Kirstin,

Speaking from a laboratory point of view, pathology slides of tissue take 4-5 days to process and read, (it also depends if the lab is a 7 day a week lab)and the pathologist usually have more than one doctor to read slides just to corrolate results. Be patient. I know it is hard.

Suzanne

Kirstin said...

Thank you, all.

Mimi said...

You got it.