News, medical and other

An e-mail I sent just now, to my faculty and registrar.

Hi all,

I'm based at the Ranch until Epiphany West, having just returned from a whirlwind (day and a half) trip to Berkeley. Dermatologist and oncologist are both pleased with me. My numbers are good (though not, as they were, better than my doctor's); I still feel like crap. I'm still losing weight, though not drastically, and I think I'm eating more. I'm still constantly achey. Even when I've slept as much as my body will, I can't get enough. I can have a conversation, but thinking is extraordinarily difficult.

Field ed mid-year eval went well. That's been the saving grace for so much else: something I can actually do, and love doing. (It's easy for me to be present on the street--maybe more so, because I know what it's like to feel sick continuously.) I sent N. an e-mail saying when she'd get the document; supervisor and I had our conference Tuesday night. Being there is working very well, for me and for them.

I sent L. a bunch of stuff relating to my cross-cultural requirement; thank God I keep a blog. We'll go from there, I'm sure.

I'm considering letting something go from fall, and intentionally letting myself fail it, so I can focus on finishing the things I need to graduate. (I took one class more than I needed this year, for the health insurance.) I "should" have dealt with it earlier--I didn't have the energy to. By the time I realized how long it had been since I had even been to the class, it was too late to drop. I kept thinking I could make it up... and I still kept (keep) choosing sleep. "Need to work. Feel like crap." Sleep wins. I'm not pleased with myself for that choice, but I'm willing to accept it.

As it is, I still have one old requirement I have to make up; an ancient, by now, paper for J. He made it as easy as he could for me. That will be done before spring term.

I'm still surviving--in both the gritting-my-teeth and triumphant meanings of that word. 5 1/2 more months of this.

peace,
Kirstin