Monday, January 01, 2007

Happy New Year!

I don’t really do resolutions; it’s too easy to break them and get depressed about it. I hope to stay whole-heartedly on the path I’m on, and if God has any relevance whatsoever, I can hardly help but do that.

I was talking with my friend and classmate Debbie at a New Year’s potluck last night. Speaking about herself, she said, “When you get serious about spiritual life, God gets serious too. Things get brought up that need healing.” I nearly choked, in knowing exasperation. Both of us knew that I know what that’s about. Normally, I go along with life pretty happily most of the time. When something bumps or bruises me, I’m fragile and thoughtful until I can find my balance, and learn whatever I need to. I had a lot of fun this Christmas—but I also was, and am, really struggling. I think I’m on the cusp of scrapping through it—but it will take some more work. The holiday sharpened the usual aches; I forget every year that this will happen. It also awakened a pain that I didn't know I had. Time, work, and love will heal it; I know this, but I also don't know it. I've always gotten stronger on the other side of "growing experiences," but it's hard to trust that I will.

The neatest thing about Christmas was something I could not have predicted. My friend Jeanne from St. Aidan’s auctioned off a Christmas vest, as a fundraiser for the afterschool program housed at our church. It was all done silently by e-mail. I bid $5 and didn’t win.

However, the winner—anonymously—gave it to me. Apparently I had expressed more enthusiasm than I knew. I found out when I served at Christmas Eve, that it had all been announced at our Advent IV service that morning. I served again yesterday, and wore it around at coffee hour. I’ve had a lot of fun with it. (I’m momentarily in Berkeley, and my camera’s in Stockton. I can add a picture tomorrow.)

I also caught up with the vocations chair yesterday. They’re meeting in a couple weeks to discuss discernment models that would fit the parish, the diocese, and people in situations like mine. (I’ve been a member for less than the usually requisite time.) I don’t know yet what will happen. He said that they meet every couple of months, and will invite me after this upcoming meeting. So by that reckoning, I will start real honest-to-goodness discernment work... on or around the Ides of March.

Yes, that is a wry grin on my face.

Here, as seen on Possible Water, is 2006 in a paragraph of nonsense. Take the first sentence from the first post of each month of the past year, paste them together, and see what you get:

I am happy to join with you today in what will go down in history as the greatest demonstration for freedom in the history of our nation. I got tagged. I must be in now! Thank you, Dixie Blue; I haven't been here in ages. I posted this on a discussion board I visit, and thought I'd repeat it here. What are you proud of yourself for? Since I came back from Spring Break (a week ago Monday), I've been feeling like each of my limbs is caught in its own separate riptide. I've been generally restless with my blog for awhile. What I've accomplished today: Got out of bed, fed myself breakfast and lunch, and brought in four boxes from the car. I'm supposed to be writing a sermon... and I'm stuck. Yes, I’m still alive. The subject of an e-mail I haven’t answered yet reads, “Are you home?” Yes, you never hear from me anymore; you just read my homilies. I preached this morning at St. Aidan's. It’s been a busy week.

Yet another blogger who blogs about blogging; that’s me. Peace to all in the New Year!

1 comment:

Mimi said...

Happy, Happy New Year, my friend.

Debbie SO speaks the truth.